B.I.A. (Back in Action)

My last post would have been really funny if it was intentional, or really cool if I had a story to go along with it. Like, for example, if Roxy had updated my blog because I went missing after being assigned a top secret spy mission across the globe. That would have made my mysterious title-only post awesome. 

Here's what really happened. 

I was five minutes away from taking a very long nap when I realized that I missed blogging. So without anything in particular to say, I sat down to a blank computer screen hoping for words worth writing down. 

They say you should write what you know. 

And that is exactly why I titled my post M.I.A. Because if there's one thing I know, it's how to go successfully missing--bounce off the radar, if you will. 

And if there's two things I know, it's that using acronyms like M.I.A. makes your life seem more edgy and adventurous. 

So, I wrote M.I.A. in the title box with every intention of writing a clever something as to why I never blog anymore. 

But, before I could even get to that clever something, I hit publish post and the title went straight to my blog. That's when I decided to just leave it there by its self for a few minutes while I wrote the rest of the post.

Unfortunately, lately there has been a word drought around here. I've considered buying a thesaurus and reading it in my spare time. I've thought about writing essays that weren't required. I even tried watching 30 minutes of Word Girl--a super hero PBS cartoon that runs right after Curious George on Wednesdays--to try to get the water flowing again. My next plan is to build a well in the backyard. If nothing else, it ought to be an interesting enough experience to give me something to write about. 

So, basically, I never got around to posting my reasons for missing in action. And basically that's why my syntax sucks, my words aren't working, and even my alliteration is lacking. 

Not to mention, my room is a mess, Roxy could use a walk, piles of laundry are dressing my floor, and I have absolutely nothing to say for myself. 

M.I.A.? Definitely. 

M.I.A. from anything other than mental capacity? Not so much.

But still, for sure, M.I.A.

This, I believe, is the part of the story where my sexy spy partner who I have loathed up until this point, finds me just before the bad guys begin Chinese water torture.

He releases me just in time for the water pipes, which meant to drip slow drops of insanity, to explode. Doused with water we run through the industrial style halls of the bad guy's lair as things self-destruct in the background. Which of course is totally HOTT (with two Ts) because my hair looks fantastic wet. 

After we slide out of the building, baseball style, we watch as it crumbles to the ground. Then I realize that I have always loved my super sexy spy partner and we make out as the crumbled building spits out fireballs that look remarkably similar to fireworks.

Next a sappy and little bit eerie song begins to play when we cut to the final scene. I'm at home. And I decide to clean my room...  

Freak. Where's that super sexy spy guy when I need him?

Oh well. Maybe I'll clean my room anyway. 

And then maybe I'll find all those missing words.